Thursday, January 31, 2013


'Tis time for more bullet points so I can clear the randomness out of my noggin.

  • Vine. Ya heard? Get with it. It's an app. I'm posting cat videos like there's no tomorrow. My user name is zeromusings. Instagram is, like, so early January.
  •  I had to wear a heart monitor yesterday (did it before, no biggie, blah blah I'm not dying don't worry) and holy damn if the bizzle who put the electrode thingies on didn't scratch the everloving bejeezus out of my chest. I forgot how much that shit hurts. 
  • I submitted my book in a publishing contest with Amazon! Isn't that funny? Decided to wait until Round 2 (when they decide which authors move forward) to self-publish. If I move forward, I'll hold off again. That'll be mid-February, so stay tuned. (I fully expect to be eliminated)
  •  I can't decide whether or not I should be eating gluten. Whole grains are good ... but not gluten? I don't even know. Haven't people been eating bread for, like, thousands of years? 
  • Found out the place I quit working so I could become a full-time hermit/author had massive layoffs a few months ago. I probably would have been among the casualties. Wowee! I'm so glad for my sake and theirs that I got out of there. I probably would not have taken it well. By which I mean I would have burned that mother-effer down. 
  • God help me if I ever need another real job in an office or something. Google will not be my friend. 
  • I'm reading a new book about why everyone is fat. I simply cannot get enough of this topic. My favorite part so far is how the author says it's not our fault we're fat.
  • I'm sort of stealing this bullet point from a friend, but ... omg New Girl. The kiss? Yeah. That's the stuff. All day, every day. Except for they can't get together or I'm gonna stop watching.
  • Oh yeah. I'm thinking about going back to school for my MFA. I might be ... stupid. Me plus school has never equaled great success. But I really like writing, so? Maybe I should? Are MFAs good? Or do you just end up making your brain explode by over-analyzing other people's writing? 
  •  The other day one of the plugs in the bathroom started making a noise like the Russians were coming. It sounded like RRRAAAAAEEEEEEEEGGG. I mean. Who knew plugs could even make that kind of noise? It was alarming, to say the least. And then smoke came out of it. So I'm guessing that doesn't mean anything good. I spoke with our electrician and they suggest I not use that particular outlet until they have a chance to look at it. Heh. 
  • What would have been really funny is if the plug had made that noise while I was wearing the heart monitor. Heh. 
  •  I saw Argo a while ago, and yeah, it was good, but award winning? I'm not sure, dudes. Also, I saw Zero Dark Thirty and thought it was good as well, but I felt mildly uncomfortable watching it. And not because of the torture, which I thought was the best part. But because it's a movie about a dude we actually hunted and killed and now as a nation we are watching it and praising it and that just feels weird. Whereas when I was happy at the actual time that he was killed -- that didn't feel weird. It felt righteous and awesome. Although the crowds that gathered to cheer at the White House -- that felt weird. Maybe there is a thin line between tasteful pleasure in vengeance and celebration of death. 
  • I could keep going for a while, man. But I'm gonna stop here and go argue with myself about what to eat for a snack. Toodles.


  1. I'm thinking about going back for my MFA too. I think it's a good idea if you want to teach. I'm looking into low-residency MFA programs so I can still work and I don't have to move.

    About 10 years ago I applied to 10 MFA programs. That was exhausting and humiliating. But I did get into two of the programs. So there's that...

    1. So of course I never got to that place in my brain where a school would actually REJECT me. But that is a distinct possibility. I was thinking of going back to my alma mater, just a state school. They've got a program where you can do you teaching experience there, which makes it blissfully "easy." Mostly I am just worried about sitting in classes full of people who are smarter than I am. Oh, and also, I don't want to teach! At least, I don't think I do? Maybe I do. I mostly just want to write.

  2. Don't worry about smarter than you are. You are clearly smart. How is your ego? Do you have a sturdy one when it comes to writing? You will probably need it, because you may run into some pretty ironsides egos. If you are going to a less prestigious school, it might be easier (I know about University of Montana, and I've heard Iowa is kind of a nightmare). Have you done a lot of workshops, in college or after? If you have, you are probably prepared. If not, you will manage. All of them are different, of course, and I am no expert. If you want to chat further, let me know. Some of the low-res programs work really well and seem to have decent reputations (Goddard, Vermont College, Warren Wilson... UBC has a non-residential thing as a matter of course, but I think it's hard to get into if you are not a Canadian).

    1. My ego is nil. But what I do have working for me is that I think most people are stupid! So maybe my pretentiousness will help in that regard. Now ... workshops? I have no idea. My background is in journalism, so whole different animal. I really need to read more about the program at my local state college, since I apparently have no clue what kind of work is involved in getting an MFA. It's basically the story of my life, thinking something would be about 400% easier than it really is. :)

    2. Didn't you just write a book? You are way ahead there. A workshop is not fancy; it just means you bring your writing (or, occasionally write something there) and have it critiqued by the rest of the workshop. It also involves reading the pieces written by the stupid people. There are a bunch happening all the time, even through online workshops like Gotham. Check it out and see how you like the process. Familiarize yourself with the jargon a little, especially if you are going to write fiction. I don't know you, but I gather from how you write and how much you read that you already know most of the elements, it just really helps to know the technical terms (I didn't really even learn these getting a BA in Creative Writing).