Wednesday, July 18, 2012

miss advised: we make good life decisions

 So for starters, Emily kisses this guy -- her co-host on Sex With Emily -- and it's gross and wrong. 


 Amy gets a text from Lewis, ribbing her for getting on his case about not texting enough and asking her out later in the week. She hopes Lewis is going to help her break her year-long dry spell, if yaknow what I mean.


 Julia meets a happiness expert who has kind of icky facial hair. 

"In theory I love writing. In reality, it tortures me." YES. I GET THIS.


 Then she talks about how she always wants to be perfect and the expert tells her to be "real," just like all the other experts she meets do. 


 And then he touches her feet? I am so confused. 


 And then Julia's friend comes over and says she doesn't think it's a good idea to take the latest guy she's interested in -- Andrew -- out on a "prom" date for their first date. I concur. 


 Princess Parking Only. "The real me is a prom girl," she says. "If a guy can't handle this, he's not gonna be able to handle me anyway." She may have a point.


 This is Emily's friend Ruby, who gets the award for best quote of the evening: "Do you want to still be making out with polyamorous queer dudes when you're 50?" 


 And here's another dude, Zach, who Emily goes on a blind date with. You know your date is serious when he shows up in shorts and flip flops. He turns out to be polyamorous, too. I have to say, I have lived in the SF Bay area for a long time, and I don't think I've ever met a polyamorous couple. Emily, though, has met two in two weeks.


 Annnnd here's crazy in her actual prom dress from high school. You know, I can still fit into my high school prom dress, too. Because it was black spandex!! I was a real style icon back in the day, lemme tell ya. 


 She forces Andrew to wear this tuxedo, eat at a food truck, and go to some dive bar. She calls herself "Cinderella on crack," and once again I concur. Andrew is shockingly good-natured about the whole thing.


 Then she commands him to kiss her (as is her wont), and he complies. 
"With other guys, I'd try to ease them into my personality. But with Andrew, I didn't ease him into shit." No kidding, honey! 


And then Amy and Lewis break it off. The problem was he was too young and immature. She acted crazy around him and he responded like a dude in his 20s, which he is. 

Next time:

- Emily goes to therapy.

- Amy gets into a girl fight.

- Julia ruins everything with Andrew.

It's highly addictive.

5 comments:

  1. I saw the prom part! What do you mean by "next time" she ruins it with Andrew? This didn't ruin everything? Because I really, truly believe in being yourself on dates, but you should know how much of yourself is too much.

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    1. Well this didn't APPEAR to ruin everything. But in the preview she gets all crazy on the phone: WHY HAVEN'T YOU FLOWN DOWN TO LA TO SEE ME?! Which dudes love. And yeah, I'm all for Being Yourself, but being yourself doesn't have to equal being batshit crazy. Plenty of women probably THINK of doing or saying the things she does/says, the difference is most women have some kind of filter that prevents them from appearing insane.

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  2. I did meet a polyamorous girl in Marin. She was breaking up with one boyfriend and moving in with another one on the same day. It seems pointless to break up with anyone when you're polyamorous but maybe I don't get it.

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  3. Amazingly, Andrew seemed to have taken Julia's cracked-out prom routine pretty well. He even mentioned planning the "next date," which shocked me. I agree - be yourself, but in moderation, especially on a first date. I was happy to see that this time she didn't BEG the guy to kiss her - he appeared to kiss her willingly the first time in the limo. Maybe she just needs to find someone as insane as she is. The whole Amy/Lewis thing was not a shocker. She was crazy and he's a dude. I did think he was kind of mean to her in the diner, though. Next week looks even more juicy.

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  4. Watched Eat Pray Fight last night - can't wait to see your comments. Couldn't help but watch that crazy fight seen more than once. Wow....It's official I am hooked.

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