Friday, May 18, 2012
I mentioned this fitbit thingy I got a few posts ago, remember? It's basically a glorified pedometer. It tracks your steps throughout the day, tells you how many calories you've burned, how many flights of stairs you've climbed, yada yada. You sync up on the computer and measure yourself against your friends (I'm losing), and you can also input your meals and start a weight loss program.
Anyway, the idea is that you're supposed to walk 10,000 steps, or roughly 5 miles a day. I measured my standard walk -- only about 4,000 steps. On a non-walk day, if I'm just puttering around the house, not doing much, I'd be lucky to hit 3,000 steps. I went out for an hour-long walk, and it was only 6,500 steps. Craaaaaaaaaap.
Anyway, it's good to know there's a reason I haven't been losing weight. Hello! You need to move your ass more. Also: less wine and chocolate.
I had a dream last night that I was having terrible stomach pains, so I went to my doctor. I was sitting in her waiting room, doubled over, as her snotty receptionist eyed me over his cubicle wall, and suddenly, I birthed a little African American baby.
My doctor emerged from some back room to assess me, and I was giddy. "I actually didn't know I was pregnant!" I found this hilarious. My doctor cocked her eyebrow. The snotty receptionist said I should've known because I sure looked pregnant.
Regarding the African American-ness of my baby, I blame the three minutes of a program I watched yesterday about obese women having babies. One of them was African American and she had the most adorable baby. I apologized to my husband, since obviously the baby wasn't his. But neither of us cared, in the dream; we were so happy about the baby.
Seriously. Is it possible to loathe, and yet love Facebook at the same time? I haven't looked at it since April and It. Is. Killing. Me.
There is no question that on June 1 I will be back on Facebook, in full force. I need to know the mundane details of all of my friends' lives! I JUST DO. Related: I hate myself a little bit.