Tuesday, December 27, 2011


Christmas turned my brain into a mash of chocolate, gingerbread, and coffee (ask me what kind of cake wasn't exactly a huge hit at Christmas?). All I can do today is make bullet points.

- Ava hiccups after every feeding. I have the most adorable video of it. Maybe I will post it some day when I'm feeling less lazy.

- Ava also farts really loudly.

- The last two weeks look like a really insane blur in my brain. I finally hit a wall yesterday and spent much of the day in bed with a headache.

- We figured out how to make Ava smile: Make farting noises. She LOVES it. It's a good thing she was born into this family and not some uptight family that doesn't think farting is one of the most hilarious things ever; right up there with poop and vomit.

- I did manage to cut my toenails yesterday. Major accomplishment, woot!

- My husband did the laundry yesterday. I didn't ask him to do it; he just did. I am not sure this has ever happened.

- In related news, no one has done the dishes since Saturday night.

- What'd you get for Christmas? I got some cool stuff. My big gift was one of them fancy Garmin watches. This means I'm going to become a runner. Ahem.

- I could go right back to sleep right now. Unfortunately, more immediate plans call for scraping deadly black mold off the shower tiles. Yes, I'm well aware I am disgusting, and a poor excuse for a wife and/or housekeeper.

- I'm still reading 1Q84 and I have NO idea where this storyline is headed.


- Sometimes the most awful things happen on Christmas.

- I need a vacation.

- I have five days to finish the book. $%*%#@$. Fuck balls.

- I got a bunch of Christmas cards after Christmas, and they all had pictures of babies on them. Did I mention I need a vacation? And a vat of wine?

- Feeling sorry for myself is SO last August.

- I haven't shaved my legs in a month. I'm growing hair for warmth.

- I need to stop writing bullet points and get a move on.

- Good bye.


  1. 5 days to finish the book?! gah, dont give yourself that kinda timeline, you'll make yourself crazy!

    PS finding ways to make babies laugh is so so awesome and satisfying!

  2. This cracks me up! I'm so with you on the bad housekeeping/sheer exhaustion/need lots of wine thing. :)

  3. Holly - I'm considering giving myself an extra two weeks to make up for baby & holiday madness... I might not have a choice. :)

    Melissa - I never did scrape the mold yesterday. I did finally do the dishes. Heh.