Ok, guys. It's another listy day. It's been a few days since I blogged and there are too many unrelated thoughts bobbing around in my head.
1. I went to a bomb-ass wedding this weekend.
2. And all I got was a stupid magnet.
3. For reals! I got a magnet that says "I went to Meagan and Patrick's wedding and all I got was this stupid magnet."
4. Did I ever tell you about how my husband told me that for whichever anniversary was the cotton anniversary -- where you give your spouse something cotton -- that he should give me a T-shirt that says "I married this asshole and all I got was this T-shirt"?
5. I wore this really cool necklace to the wedding.
6. And it gave me such a bad rash on my neck. Like, dude, my neck looks like it has poison oak. And it ITCHES. Bitches.
7. I ate at Crabby Jims on the wharf.
8. It sucked.
9. OMG DID YOU SEE JAKE & VIENNA ON THE BACHELORETTE LAST NIGHT??????
10. First of all, Jake has always been totally insane. Also, he is gay, so why he is pursuing women is beyond me.
11. We started watching "Mad Men," and it's a struggle for me not to relate everything in that show to my grandfather. Everything.
12. I started reading "Born to Run." Awesome book!
13. No, I haven't finished "Kitchen Confidential." I mean, seriously. Did you read the chapter where he talks about one day in his life as head chef? Self-indulgent and annoying. And long.
14. I saw the result of a hit and run accident before the ambulances arrived, and dude, the people looked dead. But they weren't.
15. People in my neighborhood go totally rogue on Fourth of July. No need to go out to watch fireworks because these white trash bastards mean business. And I mean white trash bastards in the most complimentary sense.
16. Our neighbor's cat, Bailey, keeps shitting in my planters.
17. We are going to get air conditioning!!!!!!!!!
18. My neck itches.
19. My diet is not going well.
That is all. Good luck this week. You know short weeks are always the longest weeks of your life.