"It's been my experience that ninety-five percent of the people who walk the earth are simply inert, Johnny. One percent are saints, and one percent are assholes. The other three percent are the people who do what they say they can do."
- the character Roger Chatsworth in Stephen King's The Dead Zone
I'm not sure I agree with Roger's math, but I think he's basically right. And I don't claim to be in the three percent of doers. Lots of times I feel like I'm running on a treadmill (figuratively, as per my three chins) -- not really getting anywhere. Talking the big talk and not walking the big walk.
Last week I tried eating when I got hungry and stopping when I got full, and what I found out is that I am not hungry when I am supposed to be hungry (normal mealtimes), and I am not nearly as hungry as I think I am. After a few days, I forgot about eating when I was hungry and went back to overfeeding myself.
This week I was going to really buckle down and go no carb. And even before I went to the grocery store this morning to purchase my lackluster no-carb ingredients, I was depressed about the whole thing. All meat and no bread makes Jack a dull boy.
So I bought bread. Some kind of freak bread that's low on the glycemic index. The fact that I know what the glycemic index is makes me want to punch myself in the face.
I bought fruit and vegetables and meat. I bought tortillas. I bought diet-friendly ice cream bars and a bottle of wine. I am waving the white flag -- whether in defeat or surrender, I'm not quite sure right now. I'm going to try to eat my marginally healthy food when I am hungry, and stop when I am not.
I'm going to return to yoga even though I fricking hate yoga, because I love how yoga makes me feel. I'm going to go back to the track, return to my 5K goal.
I want to do, not just say.