Thursday, April 15, 2010

At rest

He didn't make it.

I'm not sure why or how he'd miraculously bounced back from the grave earlier in the week, not that it matters now.

I took the 'come now' call at 12:30 am today from a nurse. I stayed with my grandma, who is very frail, and my mom went to the hospital. I stared at the ceiling until 7 am, when I got the final warning text message from my mom. I frantically tried to get my grandma out the door, but as I was finding her socks, I found out it was too late. I had to tell her. Telling someone who's been married for, what, 60 years? That her husband was gone and we'd missed his final moment? That was a killer.

They are napping now. I tried unsuccessfully. There are relatives and friends to tell, funeral arrangements to make. People are calling. People are on their way over. The irony of funeral arranging is that you must do it when you least feel like it. Maybe that's not ironic.

I'm grateful he did not suffer long, and did not suffer at all in the end. I'm fortunate to have your good thoughts. It helps.

8 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry Erin. Very inadequate words. I'm really glad he didn't suffer at the end.

    Thinking of you.

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  2. Oh Erin, I'm so sorry!!!! You have been and will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

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  3. I am shocked and saddened for you and your whole family. Thinking and praying for you all. Hang in there.

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  4. PS You are an amazing granddaughter. And daughter. And wife and sister and writer and everything. Even though I know you feel empty, your strength seems endless.

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  5. Ugh. Sorry, Erin. You and your family are in our prayers.

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  6. I am with you Honey. When Dad and I had to tell Grandma about Mom it was the worst.

    I'll miss that tough old guy and his awesome martini and margarita stories.

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  7. All I can say is yuck. That and I'm so sorry.

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  8. So sorry for your loss and knowing nothing typed hear can really ease the pain right now. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
    Grandparents are treasures you get to hold in your heart forever :)

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