More fun than a barrell of monkeys

Have you heard about the "No 'Poo" movement? It's huge. No pun intended, seriously. I'm not talking about POO poo. I'm talking about SHAMpoo.

There's a subset of people who believe that the chemicals in shampoo may be harming them and the environment, and they also believe the body knows how to naturally regulate hair cleanliness, so they are boycotting shampoo. They say the initial shampoo detox period can last for several weeks but after that your hair naturally regulates itself and will look more beautiful and glossy than ever. Results vary, apparently, considering some women who've tried it proclaim they spent six weeks with greasy, itchy heads, utterly miserable.

Ok, so, look.

I'm all about this less chemical, environmentally friendly, better for you stuff. I want to cook slow food and exercise outside and wash myself with homemade soap. I want to filter my water and buy organic and grow my own garden and juice pesticide-free carrots. I want to eat hormone-free meat and eat less meat and practice yoga and also meditate. I want to wear chemical-free makeup and start composting and I want to carry my future babies around in a sack on my back all day because that's the way tribeswomen do it and have you ever heard their babies cry?

But let's face it. I cannot go No Poo. Some of the things I mentioned just now, maybe I could do. Some of them are not feasible for me. Such as No Poo. I have thin hair that's limp and greasy by the end of the day, let alone Day 2 without a wash. If I went No Poo, I would be miserable. My hair would no longer smell like artificial flowers; it would smell like dirty, greasy scalp.

So in conclusion: No poo is a no go. Best of luck to all of you shampoo-free babes out there, but that ain't me.